Things I’ve Killed and Other Stuff

17 Sep

Please don’t ask me to water your plants. Or check on them while you’re out of town. Or to do anything regarding anything that grows in the ground.

Unless you’re sick of it and want it dead. Then I’m your girl.

I have killed a number of things since I started work. Okay, it’s not really work’s fault. I just tend to kill things. Plant-y things, I mean.

Green thumb? No…more like Black Thumb of Death.

Below is evidence in the upcoming murder case.

Exhibit A. Yellow Rose. Cause of death: Homicide.

Exhibit B. Black Thumb of Death strikes again!

Exhibit C. Cut roses. So not my fault!

In, other news, today is the last day of my twenties. I spent it doing super fun stuff, like laundry. See?

Dead clothes.

Okay, that’s not really how I do laundry (usually)(only sometimes)(when I’m super lazy)(and it’s dry clean only, because really? no.).

That is the result of three hours of cleaning out my closet. Oh yes, twenties are going out with a bang.

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