Doomed

30 Sep

I have new potential victims for the Black Thumb of Death.

My in-laws visited this weekend and my mother-in-law loves plants so she helped pick some new ones for the yard. Yes, she knows about my plant-killing tendencies…she is in denial. And we bought cheap-ish plants.

Ever since we moved to Florida I have wanted fruit trees and this weekend I found some. I now have a key lime tree and a meyer lemon tree in my back yard. (In the spot where my yellow rose recently bit the dust.)

Key lime tree…see the limes? Time for mojitos!

Because I am impatient (Yes Lauren, I know patience is a virtue, but again, it is not one I possess), we bought trees that already have fruit on them. Of course we did…otherwise it’s just another stick with leaves on it…I have those already. So, hopefully…in a week or so… if they’re not dead… I’ll have lemons and limes in my yard. Yay!

I also got some herbs. My guess is these will be the first to die. If they last the week…I’ll be happy! I tried herbs once…it didn’t go well. I fried them in their pots on my balcolny. Apparently they don’t like 100+ temps with no water. Who knew?

I’m growing (or killing is probably a better word) basil, cilantro, mint and rosemary.

Rosemary…looks good…for now.

The thing with herbs is that I like to touch them….obviously right? That’s the best way to smell them…crush up the leaves in your hand. But I’m kind of allergic to everything so after playing with herbs all afternoon I had to come home and take a Benadryl because my hands were swollen. Awesome. The husband will be on herb-cutting duty from now on.

(Side note: Did I tell you about burning the heck out of my hands chopping jalapenos for salsa this summer? No? Well, I did. Apparently you need gloves when chopping spicy things. Did everyone know that but me? FYI…you can wash them, pour olive oil on them, soak them in milk, soak them in cold water, run them under hot water, take Benadryl, take Advil and try anything else you can think of but the only thing that makes the burning stop is waiting it out. For 48 hours. Of pain. Just use the gloves. Trust me.)

We also planted a rose (I know, I know…I’ve already proven that this was a bad idea) and a bougainvillea at the mail box and a giant iris out back.

New roses. Doomed from the start.

For my birthday my mother-in-law gave a plumeria tree since I decided while we were in St. Kitts that I had to have one in my yard right now please and thank you. I have high hopes for this tree but the fact is, it’s chances aren’t good. It’s a tropical tree and Jacksonville is hot as hell but not technically tropical. So….yeah…we’ll see.

Plumeria…I kinda forgot it takes awhile for a tree to flower. I really like the pretty-smelly-good flowers.

So, who’s taking bets on how long it’ll take me to kill this stuff? I’ve got a hundred bucks on everything being dead by Christmas. (I know…I’m trying to be optimistic.)

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